Wrench

That is exactly what was thrown into my happiness strut...a monkey wrench. I called a friend who I have not talked to in a while. There was something in her voice that didn't sound right. Either she was upset or she was sad. I asked. She tells me that a friendship is like a plant, and if it is not watered you can not expect it to survive. I was dumbfounded. She continued to tell me that she put forth much effort and my token response was always, 'everything is good with me, very busy.' The hurt and confusion I felt were immediate.

I didn't bother explaining. There was no point, I know her. She was going to be heard. So I listened.

I didn't bother explaining because I had felt the same way months before and decided to reduce my effort in order not to feel resentment...in the 'why do I feel I am doing all the work here' kind of way. I have the phone bills to prove it for goodness sake.

My day ended in a terrible funk yesterday and it continued today.

Is this the right time to let this go? Or should there be an attempt to renew? Years ago I'd fight for things like this, today I respect wishes.

Closet blogger?

My friend admitted to having a blog. I said nothing about mine.

Tick...

I've been listening to college radio a bit. Some guy was describing Los Angeles as a giant tick which is ready to explode.

I was on my way to pick up some food, instead I drove straight home. Yuk!

Oh yeah, it's time to go back and visit.

Snippet

"...when you get what you want but not what you need..." tiny snippet from a new Coldplay song. I've never thought of myself as a groupie, but I love these guys.

Singles

Something is in the air. Something that is making all my single friends seriously start thinking about dating with the end result being a long-term committed relationship (oh, how I avoid the word marriage). The scary thing is that all this talk about dating has me thinking about dating as well. I don't need this kind of pressure. Then again, it could be exactly the kind of pressure I need.

One of my friends was telling me that her mother wants to pray to some saint so my friend will find that someone. What?! Are you kidding me? Then again, it's along the same lines as having my family think I might be gay. jejejeje

I'm calling J on an almost daily basis because her due date was this Sunday, 5/22. No baby yet and she is losing her patience...there was little patience to begin with.

Ah, life!

Too happy?

I've been in a great mood lately and damn it makes me happy. I realize how I have changed. There were a couple of years where I was that annoying person who was always happy. Nowadays, it's not that I am unhappy, depressed or anything negative per se. I'm blah...not happy...not unhappy...no extremes. That's definitely better than being on the negative side, but having this glimpse of the positive side makes me want it all the time.

Breather

There should be a law against passing a certain level of busy. And if it is not fun busy, someone ought to be hanged. The last thing I want to do these days is anything computer related the minute I get I get out of work. To be at work for 12 hours on average and not even have the time to check the news online is ridiculous. And my blogging suffers...actually it's the first thing to go.

Well I am back, and with renewed commitment, just not tonight.

Unleashed

Jet Li. This guy makes me want to take up one of the martial arts. I wonder if he has an autobiography. I'd like to read about him.

It was not a straight 'action' film like the previous one. It had a human spin on it. Didn't love it, but I liked it. There is something that is so peaceful about Morgan Freeman, like the universal grandfather.

What was going on with 40 something year old Jet Li and that 18 year old girl? That was almost disturbing.

Monster In Law

Eye candy for the men. Eye candy for me...Michael Vartan. This movie was cute, but I thought it was going to be funnier. A lot funnier. They did what they always do put the funniest parts in the commercials.

It did make me want to move to Santa Monica/Venice Beach area though. (sigh) It's time to go visit Los Angeles again.

Casino Celebration

Celebrated a friend's birthday at a local casino. It was fun and I lost money.

I was one of three 'straight' women in a room of twelve. I never would have placed myself in that scenario in my wildest imagination. Just goes to show you, you never know where life may lead you.