Moving Time

After years of procrastination, I start moving tomorrow. I've only packed part of the kitchen, the restroom and the closet which is about 30% of everything. I'm stressed. It's really no ones fault but my own. Over ten friends (who have found out by accident) have offered to give up their weekend to help me move without my asking. And every single one of those people I have turned down, saying 'no thank you, it will be fine.' This is one of my have to work on things, accepting help from others. I have no problems helping people, friends or strangers, but if they try and do the same thing I can't accept it. I'd call that an issue. ;)

Yesterday I cried at work. I hated myself for it, but it was better than what I was capable of doing...cursing out the people stressing me beyond my limit. I wound up crying because I did not want to start yelling, so all that bottled negativity made an appearance via tears. I told my project manager three times to leave me alone. He did not stop. He kept following me, venting, all the while raising his voice. The fourth time, I told him I couldn't take it anymore and bailed out of a very important meeting. I didn't go. I went to the water and walked for an hour. I was five minutes late to another very important meeting, but feeling much calmer. Finally made it back to my desk and there is a note: "I owe you an apology." By the end of the day it was okay. Apologies exchanged and accepted. We are all stressed beyond acceptable limits. This is what happens when our boss wants a three month project successfully completed in two weeks...because the boss wants the recognition. Jerk.

A friend got engaged...after 10+ years in a long-term relationship. I'm very happy for her, this is what she's wanted for a long time.

I leave for Mexico in less than a month. No computers, no passwords, no telephone, no TV, no radio. All that gone for two weeks. Replaced with long conversations with my grandmother. Delicious home cooked meals. Quiet. A night sky packed with stars. Clean air. In other words, Heaven on Earth.